Photo by Bart LaRue on Unsplash
Valentine’s Day comes once a year and the day usually focuses on love for another. In this blog I explore self love – the regard for one’s own well-being and happiness. My research shows me that perfectionists are most in need of this kind of love and as a recovering perfectionist I can relate.
Why is self love important?
Self love is good for your:
- Mental health
- Well-being
- Reduced depression & anxiety.
- Happiness
Some common health effects from lack of self love:
- Irritable Bowel Syndrome (aka IBS) – a functional disorder of the bowel that includes abdominal pain, cramps, bloating & bouts of diarrhoea or constipation
- Fibromyalgia – widespread muscle pain & tenderness and the distress that comes from it.
- Eating disorders – anorexia, bulimia, a focus on exercise and body weight & appearance
- Depression – not just a low mood but a serious condition that affects physical & mental health
Self love starts with self compassion:
- Be kind to yourself –
- Treat yourself with the same kindness, gentleness and compassion you do with your best friend or a child.
- Eat healthily.
- Drink lots of water
- Rest
- Get plenty of fresh air.
- Stretch, move your body, exercise.
- Do more of what you enjoy.
- Be with people whose company you enjoy.
- Laugh often.
- Mindfulness –
- Be mindful of what you are saying to yourself. That conversation has been going on for so long that it’s a default you may not even recognise as something you can change. Just like your GPS gets to know you and your usual routes your self-talk can be directed another way. It starts by being aware of what you are saying to yourself. Listen instead to those other words and what they are saying to you – “stop”, “you are pushing too hard”, “can we have a break?” “let’s play outside for a while”, “you did that really well”, “you are so great at that”.
- You are human –
- In the spectrum of humanity all emotions, thoughts, perceptions, ideas and feelings are allowed. We are here to experience life in all its glory and that includes the challenges and struggles on the way to success and happiness. Part of being human is accepting that mistakes do happen. This does not mean that you are a failure; what you did was the failure and that is a learning opportunity.
Self love is an inside job. When you’re in charge of loving yourself the rest begins to take care of itself. For side effects like happiness, well-being, good health, great relationships and reduced depression and anxiety then one of the best things to do for yourself is to practice self love.
Is it time to put you first? Contact me to find out partnering with a life coach can help you spread the love that starts with self love.