I love nothing more than driving a clean car; it’s been number one priority since new. But lately I’ve stopped looking at it, I’ve hidden stuff in the boot, I’ve taken out bits and I’ve randomly put things back. I’ve made do with what I had, I’ve used workarounds, I’ve made excuses,  in essence, I’ve tolerated it, with words that have minimized the extra effort and the less than effective results I’ve been putting. I’ve made my life harder than it needs to be by tolerating the status quo.

What things are you delaying? A repair, a replacement, a new model. Recently I’ve started doing repairs, replacements and new models and a couple of things have really jumped out at me:

• It’s not been anywhere near as painful as I’d expected
• It’s cost me less than I’d thought it would and
• The results have turned out to be so much better than I’d hoped for – almost as good as new, easier to use, nicer to look at, proud to be seen with!

Sometimes no-one else notices, but I know and it’s more than worth it. Life has become easy once more and the peace of mind that comes with it means I’m more relaxed and enjoying things again.

What have you been avoiding? Speaking up, asking for something you want or need, or saying no. Even though I’m better at this than I was I am still challenged when it comes to speaking. I worry about all sorts of things – what if I upset them? what if they don’t like me? what if I get what I want, then what? These are all fears and each time I have spoken up or taken affirmative action the results are so rewarding.

• What if I upset them? I can only be responsible for my actions; I can’t be responsible for theirs. Despite all my best intentions and all my polite manners, I can still upset someone.
• What if they don’t like me? It often takes me way too long to realize that the bad behavior I’ve been receiving is really because they don’t like or respect me. In the end, it’s turned out that actually I don’t like them and the best thing for me has been to move on.
• What if I get what I want? –This one still surprises me! More and more I trust that it’s okay to ask for and to get what I want.

What are you tolerating? And more to the point – why are you tolerating it?

• “Everyone else does” is not a good reason.
• “That’s just the way they are” is not either and
• “It’s always been like that” can be questioned.

The less than ideal situations are easy to explain away until enough is enough and things have to change. Even a small change to the status quo can make a big difference to how it can be.

I am enjoying my car again. The major repairs turned out to be quite simple and have made such a difference to my driving enjoyment. I’m culling my belongings so I don’t have to hide things in the boot. The order is being restored, things are being done easily and life is being enjoyed once more.

Do you want to move past tolerating things and putting up with a less than satisfactory situation or outcome? Contact me to see how partnering with a life coach can help you move past tolerating things to loving what you have.